Self-doubt is a completely natural part of the human experience that all of us experience at one point or another in our lives. While too little self-doubt can be dangerous, too much can cause us to become overly cautious and even prevent us from doing things that would help us in the long run.
If these statements resonate with you and you find that self-doubt is causing you to consistently sell yourself short, whether in your professional or personal life, then keep reading this guide to learn about self-doubt in depth and, more importantly, how to overcome it.
What is self-doubt?
Self-doubt is that flickering feeling of uncertainty that makes you second-guess everything you do. It might take the form of a voice that makes you ask yourself, “Am I really qualified for this?” or “Maybe someone else could do it better.” This voice often stops you from speaking up or saying “yes” to a big opportunity. Whether it’s holding yourself back from pursuing online BSN programs for non nurses or not booking that solo trip you’ve been eager to go on, self-doubt can not only keep us from advancing our professional lives but also hinder our personal growth.
Examples of what self-doubt can look like
Self-doubt doesn’t always shout. Sometimes, it whispers. For example, if you find yourself procrastinating (in general or with just one particular task), this could manifest as self-doubt, causing you to delay taking action because you’re not sure if you’ll succeed. Equally, over-preparing could be a sign that you’re working hard not out of passion, but out of fear of being found out, in other words, impostor syndrome.
Often, self-doubt can also prompt you to constantly compare yourself to others and draw the conclusion that you’re not good enough. You may be familiar with this instance of self-doubt if you find yourself thinking that your colleagues can do a better job at something than you. When opportunities come your way, you may let them pass you by, believing yourself to be incapable of taking advantage of them. Or, perhaps you notice that you often downplay your wins, attributing your success to luck rather than skill.
All of these examples are rooted in self-doubt, and they often trigger a vicious cycle that fuels self-doubt further. Above all, they show that self-doubt is not always obvious; sometimes, it can masquerade as being “realistic” or “just cautious.”
What causes self-doubt?
While there’s no single cause of self-doubt, several common threads often feed into it. Past experiences can often haunt us in the present, with past failures or poor decisions dealing a blow to our confidence. We may dwell on times when we didn’t meet expectations, and instead of focusing on how we can improve in the future, we allow self-doubt to take root.
Tied closely to this is fear of failure, another common cause of self-doubt. This fear that we may not be able to replicate our past successes or live up to certain expectations leaves us paralyzed. One other cause of self-doubt is constant self-criticism. While some people find it motivating to urge themselves to do better, repeatedly picking themselves apart only fuels self-doubt.
Why it’s important to avoid selling yourself short
When we let self-doubt dictate our choices, we quietly sabotage ourselves. We miss out on opportunities not because we aren’t ready, but because we believe we aren’t. Selling yourself short can:
- Limit your career and creative potential
- Erode your confidence over time
- Undermine relationships and communication
- Lead to burnout from overcompensating
- Keep you in a cycle of playing small
And perhaps most painfully, self-doubt can prevent you from finding out what you’re truly capable of.
Strategies for how you can overcome self-doubt
You don’t have to eliminate self-doubt; you need to know how to make sure that it doesn’t stop you from taking acting or taking advantage of opportunities when they come your way. Next time you start hearing that taunting voice spouting criticisms, here are some strategies you can try out to silence it:
1. Name it
Simply noticing the voice of doubt helps you to address it. Label it: “This is self-doubt talking.” You could even consider giving it a silly name (The Impostor Gremlin or Walter the Worrywart are two options if you can’t think of any) to discredit it and take away some of its power. That small step gives you distance and perspective from your self-doubt, allowing you to consider your situation more objectively.
2. Challenge the thought
Ask yourself if what your self-doubt is telling you is actually true. Become a detective, looking for evidence that proves the thought right. More often than not, you’ll find that your self-doubt is merely exaggerating. Perhaps more importantly, however, you should ask yourself: would you say this to a friend who felt the same way?
3. Keep track of your wins
Write down your achievements, big and small. Revisit them when doubt creeps in to remind yourself that you are more capable than you think. This act of self-reflection also allows you to learn from the past, better preparing you for future success rather than dwelling on what has gone wrong.
4. Talk to someone
A mentor, trusted friend, family member, or therapist often has enough distance from you and whatever situation you find yourself in to help you see things more clearly and kindly. In addition, saying our concerns aloud can help to take away some of the control that self-doubt holds over you, or even make you realize that it’s not actually an accurate representation of you or your situation.
Self-doubt isn’t a flaw, and it’s not always right. It can manifest in many different ways in our lives, from procrastination and over-preparing to downplaying wins and constantly comparing ourselves to others. While different factors contribute to self-doubt, it’s important not to sell yourself short and employ different strategies to overcome self-doubt. Bit by bit, as you prove to yourself that you can show up and do challenging things, self-doubt loses its grip. Don’t let it run the show, and trust in your own abilities.
Photo by Kelly Sikkema; Unsplash
